If I Had a Billion Dollars…

A blogger I’ve been following for quite a while, Stephanie Faris, is starting up a “group blog” thing. Each Thursday, everyone participating writes on the same topic and links up. Seems like a cool idea (i.e., it saves me the trouble of thinking up a topic), so why the heck not? This week’s topic:

If I Had a Billion Dollars…

You’ve just been handed a billion dollars. You’ll never have to work again. Problem is, now you have unlimited time on your hands. How do you choose to spend your days?

Honestly, I’d rather have a billion euros, but whachagonna do? See, the trouble is that a billion dollars just doesn’t mean what it used to when I was a kid. An island here, an island there…pretty soon you’re out of cash.

To be fair, it’s not like I don’t wonder what it would be like to be wealthy. Not just smudged a bit, but really filthy rich. Here’s the thing: I actually have little desire to be rich. I just want to have so much money to spend when I want to that I don’t have to worry about it. But it’s never that simple.

If you have money, there are always people around more than eager to help you part with it. In fact, they’ll do it without you having to participate in the transaction at all. Isn’t that considerate of them? So, I suppose the first thing I do with that billion dollars is protect it. It won’t be cheap, but since I’d be keeping a relatively low profile, it shouldn’t be too awful.

After that, the first thing is to set up trusts and other arrangements for all those I consider to be my family (whether or not related by DNA or legal papers) so that they never have to worry about educating themselves or their kids. Maybe even some help with other things, too, but that can get really messy really quickly. Probably best to stick with education.

I would plop a generous endowment on my beloved alma mater, both academically and to the programs of women’s basketball and other non-revenue sports . It gave me so much that tangible thanks are most definitely in order.

I’d try to own a women’s sports franchise. WNBA, WPS, NPF, whatever. They give me joy.

After that… I don’t really want for much. Sure, some getting to buy whatever shiny techno stuff is cool, but I’m a writer. I write.Whether I have money or don’t have money, I write. Sure, I commit acts of art, too, but mostly I’m a writer. All that requires is peace and something with which to write.

So the rest of the money, of which there is likely to be a still considerable amount? I don’t know. Maybe start a research lab to create advanced artificial intelligence (AAI). It’s my opinion that AAI machines will one day be our descendants. Probably best to get going with that sooner rather than later.

And that’s what I do with my billion dollars.

Don’t forget to check out Steph’s post If You Had a Billion Dollars… to see her take on this. If you blog, why not join in? You know you want to.